Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Tiger's Quest by Colleen Houck | DNF Review

SPOILERS // SPOILERS // SPOILERS // SPOILERS // SPOILERS // SPOILERS

Tiger's Quest by Colleen Houck
The Tiger's Saga #2
First Published: 2011
Paperback
Young Adult, Fantasy
Rating:
Back in Oregon, Kelsey tries to pick up the pieces of her life and push aside her feelings for Ren. But danger lurks around the corner, forcing her to return to India where she embarks on a second quest--this time with Ren's dark, bad-boy brother Kishan, who has also fallen prey to the Tiger's Curse. Fraught with danger, spellbinding dreams, and choices of the heart, TIGER'S QUEST brings the trio one step closer to breaking the spell that binds them.

DNF at 56% / p.273

When I wrote this review originally, I fooled myself into thinking I might one day finish this monstrosity, and I said as much in the review. I have since came into terms with the fact I wouldn't, and I am quite relieved. I just couldn't deal with this book, for the following reasons. Be warned, it's long. 

Reason #1: Kelsey 

I wasn't even ten pages into the read when I realized I'm going to hate Kelsey in this installment. Every bit of respect I gained for her by the end of book one evaporated just like... poof. Everything that was good and likable about her was crushed and destroyed. 

There are two words to describe Kelsey now: pathetic and annoying. She would not stop crying over Ren--a man she chose to leave. Seriously? Stop the pity party! Stop telling me every three seconds how miserable you are. And for god's sake, say his effing name

Oh, and did I mention that among all the crying and whining she was seeing three different guys at the same time? Trying to move on with your life is great and all, but how is this okay? How 'bout you try dating one guy at a time? 
And the most annoying, pull-your-hairs-out part? When Ren tells her she should date both him and Li at the same time so she could choose who she wants fair and square, she goes and tells him that usually a person only dates one person. Good to know you understand the concept of two-timing. Too bad you forgot all about it when you were effing three-timing.
Of course, when she is not whining and crying and moaning she is amazingly able to solve every problem at the blink of an eye, without any struggle or trouble. There is no sense of accomplishment to Kelsey's "victories", because you don't feel like she had to work at all for any of it. This is not an intelligent heroine, this is just plain ridiculous. It takes all the tension out of the story. 

Reason #2: The Romance
I've never before been physically hurt while reading a book, but it happened here. My eyes hurt from all the eye-rolls over how sickly sweet and cheesy it was, and I'm not even joking. Luckily for me I was reading on my bed, otherwise the head-banging would have really hurt, too. 

Seriously, what the hell happened? Ren and Kelsey always had the type of sticky relationships, and I liked it alright in book one, but there is such a thing as too much of that, and this book crossed it... big time. 
But I think I could've stomached it, if it was just Ren and Kelsey. But noooo, the entire effing universe has to fall in love with Kelsey, and that love just makes everything alright and miraculously heals all ills! Without her everyone would be lost and depressed because she is just sooo amazing and incredible and... stuff. 
WHY GOD WHY?! There is no good reason for anyone to love this Kelsey. The promise of a love-triangle of epic proportions approaching makes me want to kill somebody. Preferably Kelsey so all this ridiculousness could end. 

Reason #3: The Writing
If you've read my review of book one, you know I had issue with Houck's writing. The writing did not improve in this installment, but instead I notice new problems atop of the old ones. 

The monologues were kind of... off. Especially when someone explained something that had happened. It took me a while to realize that was because the characters were not speaking like people, but more like how the narrator in the story was explaining things. All you had to do was take off the quotation marks, and you'd never know it was a person talking. 

Add to that the massive info dump. Full chapters were just Kadam telling Kelsey things, sometimes really unnecessary things, without anything else happening. I almost fell asleep, I was so bored! 
This is how I came at 56% percent to call it quits. I could not deal with Kelsey or the effed up romance for a second longer. 

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