Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Dear Community: There Will Always Be Drama... and That's Okay.

So, this is kind of funny, because I don't comment on drama on my blog (at least, I never have so far) and I hate drama (over used, anyway) in books, and still I'm writing this right now.

BUT.

Folks, here's the deal; we are a community that's based on interactions and communication. Whether it's between blogger to readers, bloggers to bloggers, bloggers to authors or authors to readers. All we do is talk to one another, by our being an online community with the sole purpose of discussing what we love.

So, yes. Every once in a while there is going to be drama. It might be that author did that or that blogger said whaaat or #fakereadergirls or whatever.

Fact: every once in a while there is going to be drama in your family, or in your close circle of friends in real life. 

Another fact: those dramatic situations tend to go together. Last year, I had three major dramatic events happen with my friends one after the other. A few months ago, I had some "drama" surrounding myself.

It happens.

And when you're part of such a group, especially one united by a similar interest, of course we're going to rally around (and against) someone when something happens. Maybe it's mob mentality, and maybe... just maybe... there is nothing wrong with defending something you believe in--so long as you're not doing it in an insulting way aimed at only humiliating the other person.

There is no need to always be like "why is there so much drama in this community" or despair. There is so much drama because we're a community. And a fucking big one at that. Are all the people in the world wonderful cinnamon rolls that must be protected at all costs? 

That's a big, fat NO.

So why do you expect every author, every blogger, every reader to be?

Yes, we have a "lot of drama". Like in real life, everything always seems to happen at once. But you know what? When millions of people are part of a group online... it's hardly surprising there are going to be frictions and the occasional blow ups. It's hardly surprising we're going to find out some authors are dicks, or some bloggers are not saints, or some readers just like to insult and to bash. It's hardly surprising.

Why are you taking this so hard? 

I am a member of many online communities. THEY ALL HAVE DRAMA. This is not something that's exclusive to our readers community, and I don't want to be the bearer of bad news but... it's never going to change. You will never find a drama free community--unless it's one only you are a member of.

If you don't like hearing about these things, then close the tab when you see them. It's okay; no one is going to be upset when you chose not to be a part of that debate, no one is going to lash out on you for "being out of the loop".

But don't be upset with this community, don't despair of it, don't think "why does it have to be like this". 

It has to be like this because this is a band of humans bending together over shared interests. Humans; fight. Humans; are dramatic creatures in everything they do. Humans; can't agree on everything, can't be just logical beings, can't contain their emotions. We're not robots, we're not machines. 

And it's time we all accept this.

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